It's Far to long, It's completely Random, But that pretty much sums up P&P's Cottage Party

A timeline in a world run by schitzophrenic drunkards. Can you believe it was really 10 o'clock? It was.. Sad isn't it.


Great song, but perhaps the worst Music choice ever for a party picture slideshow.... But I'm too lazy to change it.

"Anything But Clothes"

I Think it's self explanitory.

Kriss Kross will make ya...........

Anonymous comments are officially cool again, But not as cool as ones with names.

I thought this over, and a few of the boys spoke to me, and I'm going to allow anonymous comments to the blog...

I guess it doesn't matter who writes, it's always good to get feedback, even if you have no idea who wrote it.

I will never post personal insults directed at any of my friends. That is the only time I would ever reject a comment.
I will post personal insults directed at me, and anything else whatsoever that gets sent.

Be warned, if I don't agree, or I just feel like being a dick because I find that funny, I shall impose a righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. Personified in this case by an 'Orrible cunt... Me (That was just for you slim)

that's the be all end all, I won't change that rule again... Booyakasha.

The Fergus Scottish Festival & Highland Games

As is tradition amongst many folk who grew up in Fergus, I visited the beer tent at the highland games on Saturday night.

I didn't have my camera handy, but Slim had his eyes on more than the puerto ricans that night, and as soon as I get my hands on the videos I'll have them posted.

Good things will come to those who wait..

El Fiesta De Cottage

Here are a couple videos from the long weekend at my Cottage.

There's a couple of jem moments in the first one, see if you can pick them out. Leave a comment with a guess and I'll let you know if they are thones I'm thinking. You'll get a prize if you define them amusingly.



The following is a slideshow with music everyone should know. If you're cool and were hip in the early 90's, you'll know this track. If not, well now you can be quasi-cool. Straight up oldschool styleeees. You can also visit the album here: http://ca.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/poetic_romantic/album?.dir=f9c2re2&.src=ph&store=&prodid=&.done=http%3a//ca.pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/poetic_romantic/my_photos

An open letter to Naked Gym Guys everywhere

Dear GrossNakedGymGuy,

I'm writing you an open letter to request that you please find yourself somewhere to live that has a bathroom. I'm assuming wherever you do live *coughhomlesssheltercough* doesn't have one because you seem to do EVERYTING in the change room at the gym.

I'm sure you think you're in fantastic shape for a 50 or so year old man (you aren’t), but let me tell you, no matter how in shape you think you are, I don't want to see it (and nobody else does either). I could handle it if you dried off and then got dressed, and I had to witness that, that's normal, THAT wouldn't inspire a letter.

The problem is, when I GET to the gym, you're naked, I don't know why you are, because you are usually standing in front of the sink, brushing you teeth (what the FUCK!?) or shaving (What the double fuck?!) or just wandering around the entire change room, perhaps sitting around on the benches doing nothing (What the trifecta fuck?!)

Do you not OWN a towel? I mean, they are cheap as hell. You could probably steal one, and get caught, and the guy you stole it from would be all like: "No man, it's cool, you keep it, you obviously need it more than I do... In fact I want you to have it, for the sake of everybody in here… Know what? Take my spare too."

If that wasn't enough reason to pen you this, what truly amazes me is that I'll go stretch, work out, stretch again, come back and YOU'LL STILL BE NAKED! I know this because for some reason you choose to wander out to wherever I am, within seconds of me arriving. It’s like you have some special Spidey sense but for creepy naked dudes.

You'll be showering, or in the sauna, and then as soon as I step foot in the bathroom, you're there, naked, no towel, and usually totally dry (but you were just in the sauna/shower (what the Quadra factor fuck?!)
A Spidey sense goes off when there’s trouble, creppynakedsense goes of when there's young strapping men around you want to check you out.

I'm no homophobe, and anyone that knows me can back me up there. My own MOM thinks I’m gay for Christ sakes (I’m not). The only conclusion I can come to is that you're recently out of the closet, and you aren't really sure how the whole picking up guys things goes.

Major Tip: Gay porn (or any porn for that matter) is not a realistic “Get picked up” guide. If it were, I’d be a pizza delivery guy, or a burglar in a second. Just go to some clubs (Renicance, Boots and Woody’s), or hang out on Church St. for a while, and let things happen.

I know it may be confusing since there’s a separate ladies work out area in our gym, but I assure you, it's NOT that kind of gym, and there's not nearly enough baths for it to become one anytime soon.

I've compiled a list of the most important points of change room Etiquette for you. These only apply to male, and fat, old or otherwise gross female nudity (If it's hot female nudity, the opposite of the rule applies when marked with an *):

#1) *ANY length of nudeness, is too long.
#2) Towels are good for a variety of things, most importantly: drying, and covering ones junk and/or ass. *They should be used whenever clothes are not worn.
#3) Other than showering, practice all other forms of hygiene in your own private bathroom. These include but are not limited to: Brushing of teeth and shaving. Most importantly, if you MUST perform these at a gym, be wearing SOMETHING.
#4) *If you are within a cars length of another guy while naked, you are too close.*Back away slowly, and do not make any sudden moves. Do NOT put your hands in the air.
#5) Limit your time in the change room to no more than 15-20 mins, anything else is just fucking odd.(* if I’m in the change room, SUPER* If I get to bring my video camera and there’s hot massage oil around)
#6) Do not use your creepyguysense for ill will.

Follow these simple rules, and everyone will be better off.

Regards,

The Ghetto Booty Thrill

P.S. *No, This thrill is not for you.

I'd laugh, but I'm too busy crying...

You'll know what I mean after visiting this site.

For a laugh less conflicted with, well, utter disgust, read the commentary in response to each posted "hatemail".

http://fsm.typepad.com/hatemail/

No one does a better job at solidifying my beliefs than the same people who attempt the opposite.