Newest Photo Albums

I've been slacking lately, and combined with yahoo not letting me upload before, I didn't post the 3 most recent photo albums... But now, after much anticipation, here are the links:

Pauly's Cottage

Strike Anywhere Show & Dancecave

Algonquin 2006

WARNING: HIGHLY ADDICTIVE CONTENT!

Line Rider - beta by ~fsk on deviantART

By far, the best flash game I've ever played. Want a challenge, try and have him complete one full loopity Loop, and ride off still on his sleigh. It is possible as after much frustration, I did succeed.

"Pop-Rap" Lyrics, and why I can't bring myself to call it HipHop

This is ONLY funny to me because people are so dumb they are paying for shit like this, and supporting it so heavily it's fucking Top of the charts. It's sadder to me then funny however, for the same reasons. Especially when there's so much better music out there, including intelligent "undergound" hip-hop.

Perhaps all you kiddies, or those with minds of kiddies, will understand now when your parents tell you they just don't "get" your music.... Check out these lyrics, the only thing to "get" is a fucking brain that works so you all stop listening to this trash.

Issue Date: 2006-09-23
The Billboard Hot 100

#1: Justin Timberlake - "Sexy Back"
I'm bringin' sexy back
Them other boys they don't know how to act
I think it's special... what's behind your back
So turn around and I'll pick up the slack
Comments: Well he rhymes back with back, that’s some talented shit, especially when he rhymes slack with the second "back" just because its the only thing he could think of. The fact that it makes no sense is obviously not important.

#2: Fergie - "London Bridge" (As soon as I see "Fergie" I shouldn't even have to write any lyrics down, you should already be laughing at its #2 spot.
Oh shit (oh shit)
Oh shit (oh shit)
Oh shit (oh shit)
Are you ready for this?
Oh shit (oh shit)
Ohhhhh
It’s me, Fergie
The Pimp!
Comments: I'm speechless frankly. What a role model. Ohh what the hell, one more: "I’m Fergie Ferg, and me love you long time" WOW, that's just incredible.

#3: The Pussycat Dolls Ft. Snoop Dogg - "Buttons"
Baby, can't you see?
These clothes are fittin' on me
The heat comin' from this beat
I'm about to blow
I don't think you know
I'm tellin' you loosen up my buttons babe (Uh huh)
But you keep frontin' (Uh)
Sayin' what you gon' do to me (Uh huh)
But I ain't seen nothin' (Uh)
Repeat the last 4 lines 9 Times; no I'm not exaggerating, 9 fucking times.
Comments: When did songs cease to have to make sense completely? I understand using different slang in order to maintain flow, but when could you just use words in the wrong tense or simply describe that your clothes fit, using improper grammar, and repeat an awful chorus 9 times and be #3? Excuse me whilst I smash my face on my desk.

A refreshing Gnarls Barkly at #4, not a bad song, and the lyrics are actually somewhat intelligible. 1 outa 10 = 10% = bottom of the class failure.

#5: Sean Paul- "Give It Up To Me"
From you look inna me eye gal I see she you want me
When you gonna give it up to me
Because you body enticing you makin' me horny
When you gonna give it up to me
Well if a no today girl then a must be tomorrow
When you fulfill my fantasy
Because you know I give you lovin' straight like an arrow
When you gonna give it up to me
Bonus: "You no habla ingles but just listen me when me a talk"
Comments: Wow, that’s some original shit Sean Paul, way to diversify from all your other songs. And so you know, when girls don't understand your language and you just tell them to sit there and listen to you talk at them anyhow, it's not really a good move towards "givin' her loving straight like an arrow"

I was going to do the full top ten, but I've absorbed stupidity ad nauseam. Yet another confirmation to my belief that the vast majority of people are fucking idiots.

The Model Employee

Real voicemails left for the quarter life Crisis' own Ukester by a fellow office worker.

The Protector: Reviewed

The Protector
Vengeance Knows No Mercy!
Especially when protecting the elephants you have developed what some psychologists would call "an unhealthy attraction to".

Some of the boys and I saw this movie last night, and let me tell you, it's got a lot of ass kicking. It's got so much ass kicking they had to incorporate different martial arts so "Muy Thai Vs. Muy Thai" ass kicking didn’t get boring.
They even included the rare and ancient martial art of WWE. Master and 9th degree black belt Goldberg showed off the artful moves with a grace only those trained by Sensei Hart in his basement temple in western Canada could ever achieve.

As a bonus, there were at least 80-100 arms broken in ONE SCENE. I'm not exaggerating; it was a 15-minute arm-breaking BONANZA! I feel it safe to conclude this movie has by far the most bone breakings of any film in history, even the long since forgotten medical classic: "bloodletting and bone breaking for amateur physicians: A step by step guide to curing all that ails"

For those of you who enjoy a storyline, or dialogue of any sort, or like when the actors actually speak their own lines, then you best go find yourselves another movie you uppity nosed drama lovers. I hear the film fest is on in Toronto, so see you later. SEE YOU LATER!

So what if one minute Tony Jaa's (main character) frolicking disgustingly lovingly with elephants and in the next scene the guys father's dead and his elephants are gone and he's not really even that upset about dad's death...

And so what if in the next scene this underprivileged elephant farmer is magically in a stolen cab in Sydney, Australia and being held hostage then framed for crimes he didn't commit.
And so what if somehow he ends up making enemies with the biggest gang in town and keeps having to fight everyone of them and the crooked police force who run it.

And so what if after beating them all and finding his one elephant and shipping it off in a truck he’s in a park with the one clean cop in town at sundown, then the next morning magically walking across a bridge with the same elephant he shipped off the night before, yet somehow found, retrieved and brought to a bridge to walk with him in the span of a few hours.

And so what if the top henchman, one of the main characters biggest rivals in the gang simply disappears about 3/4 of the way through and we never hear about or see him again. And so what if he is FAR more upset that his elephants been killed than he was when his own father was, and we never really find out what happens to him at the end of the movie... So what? We didn’t go to the movie expecting a Movie, we went to see it to see a martial arts demonstration in various cool looking locations RIGHT!?.... right?

NO I DID NOT WASTE $9.95 ASSHOLES!
I TOTALLY EXPECTED THE GUY TO BE PROTECTING ELEPHANTS AND IT WAS WAY BETTER THAN I COULD HAVE IMAGINED SO SHUT UP!

Swedish Chef for 14 Solid Minutes

Give me an hour, this hillarity never gets old.